“Wouldn’t it be great if emotional baggage could be lost just as easy as aircraft luggage? ”
― Anonymous
Two more weeks and you won’t have to hear me talk about moving anymore. I am amazed at all the stuff we’ve accumulated in the last nineteen years. I say nineteen, because I don’t think we ever unpacked all the stuff we had when we moved to Grandview in 2000. So far I’ve taken six big garbage bags of clothes to Goodwill, two boxes of books, 25 musical cds, miscellaneous nicknacks, some guitar shaped sunglasses (Lord knows where those came from) and shoes…mine. The shoes were high-heeled shoes that I love, but couldn’t wear anymore because they’re painful. They’ve been in my closet for years.
Packing and purging brought some great memories. I’m not gonna lie, it was emotional at times. I found a sweater that Mom wore. It’s old…still has the shoulder pads…and all balled up. I held it up close to my face, tried to put it in the Goodwill bag and then the good-memory tears fell. Nope, not letting go of this. All of the refrigerator art the kids made is going with us, too. Dennis kept a sweater that his mom made for him 50 years ago. even though he never wears it.
It will be fascinating to see what goes with us and what gets left at Goodwill. It’s kinda like our belief systems. Those memories and beliefs that hold us back need to go. Those negative beliefs can still write the script for our lives if we aren’t careful. “I can’t do this because I’m too old, too young, too fat, too skinny, I failed there before, I have no clue how I could, I don’t have enough money or” geesh, you fill in the blank.
Instead of “I can’t, because,” how about you BE the CAUSE that overcomes those limiting beliefs and designs your own life? How about you BE CAUSITIVE and pack those defeatist attitudes up in a big black garbage bag and haul them out to the curb for the trash man. Go back, rewrite those gloomy memories so they serve you. Learn from them because you’re not that person any more. You probably would do it differently and better as the person you are now. You bet I would be a sober and better parent if I understood then what I do now.
If the memory or event is a secret something that someone has done to you that has had a terrible impact, find a trusted friend or coach and tell them about it. Shame and/or guilt loves to be kept secret, but they both are dispelled when brought out into the open. I’ve experienced tremendous emotional freedom handling my past this way.
Remember, where our focus goes, there our energy flows. When we think about our past, let’s direct the most energy on our great achievements and warm memories. But most of all, let’s center our attention on our goals, dreams and those desires that might be in our future. That’s the kind of emotional energy that propels us forward,
Being causative,
Jan
Jan McDonald
The John Maxwell Team
PS You can buy my book “Fruitful Leadership; Leading by The Fruit of The Spirit” on Amazon.
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